Monday, May 4, 2009

The race is off...the email to end it

I had a bad weekend. After being weak, sick, shaky, high blood pressure, low blood sugar, I decided to hell with the "getting to the finish line" first that I initiated with my girlfriend that's on Medifast. Here's the email I sent her this morning:

Hi Dawn,
Okay, I'm calling our friendly competition to an end. The reason is that I think it's killing me. I've known you for over twenty years and this isn't the first time we've had a weight loss competition.

Remember 1990, we entered that lose 20 pounds in a month contest at work. I weighed 155. We both made taking laxatives at the very end to lose the last few pounds. We were both so sick we thought we were going die. We lived in the bathroom the day of our weigh in. It was the first time we'd taken a laxative and the last. We promptly gained back the 20 pounds and more.

We did the Weight Watchers at work three years ago and even though it wasn't a formal competition, we were both competing each week to lose the most weight. We both know what happened there, again we both gained the weight back.

You would think I'd learn after all these years that losing weight as quickly as possible is positively idiotic. I always gain it back as fast or faster than I lost it. Since we (I know, it was my blasted idea) started this last Tuesday, I've dropped five pounds. Yesterday I was 151.2. Last Tuesday I was 156.6.

How did I manage to lose that much at this stage in the game? Simple, I over-exercised and didn't eat enough. I had a few days of three hours of exercise and several days of two hours. I've worked out the last seven days without a day off.

Yesterday it all came to a head. I woke up feeling kind of nauseous and weak. I weighed and was thrilled to see 151.2 on my scales. I went for a bike ride where 3/4 up the steepest hill and when my heart rate was 161, I had to stop and throw up. Stopping so suddenly when my heart rate was so high made me feel like I was having a heart attack. I barely made it the rest of the way home (another four miles of hills).

I got home and went to Costco, where half-way through shopping I almost past out. I went to the bathroom and threw up again. Except there was nothing to throw up because I hadn't eating since 8am and it was 3pm (there was the bike ride at 1pm where I burned 540 calories). I had to call Jack to come finish the shopping so I could go home. When I got home I checked my blood pressure, it was 139/80. That's the highest it's been in over a year. I think my body was overly stressed.

I think you can see what I've been doing. Basically, everything wrong. Too much exercise, not enough food, trying to lose weight as fast as possible so I can win. If I continue down this path I'm going to lose my health and that certainly won't make me a winner.

I'll happily pay you for whatever you lose. I just want out of the race. I still want to lose my last 20 pounds (okay, now it's only 16 pounds), but I don't want to lose everything I've work towards for the last 14 months. I don't want to lose my health. I'll lose the weight at my own pace, maybe six months, maybe a year, but I refuse to set unrealistic goals for myself.

This way, it's a win-win situation. You'll win because you'll make goal sooner than me, and you're as competitive as me, maybe even more, so that will make you happy. I'll win because I'll get to stay healthy and feel good.

Your friend,
P.S. -- if I ever suggest a weight loss competition again, you have my permission to slap me up side the head.


Tony said...

Good decision Diana. there is a reason why most of those biggest loser contestants gain all the weight back.

antgirl said...

Ditto on what Tony said.

No wonder you were feeling shaking and all that! You didn't mention your lack of calorie intake.

Cheers to going back to your healthy ways!

Graciela said...

I was very glad to read this post. Above all, your health should be your priority.

~ugly girl with a beautiful heart~ said...

Good for you Diana. I'm so very proud of you, and see this e-mail as very very much an inspiration! What do we do to ourselves when we push ourselves to be better? Completely counter active, no?

Keep your head up, feel better soon, and get yourself back on to the healthy road!

Fatinah said...

I was so happy to read this post - I was quite worried that you would undo all the good that you've been doing. Look at you - YOU GET IT!!!! I'm so impressed. So many blogs I read (me included, sadly sometimes) just don't get it. You do. Bravo!