Tuesday, August 25, 2009

forgetaboutit

The binges
I'm going to stop talking so much about my binges. I've beaten that dead horse to death. Yes, I definitely have a problem with binge eating, but not every night, just some nights. Sometimes a few nights in a row and then I'm okay for a few nights. I don't know, maybe that's normal. What is normal anyway, does anyone even know?

I noticed the more I talked about the binge eating, the more obsessive I became about it. I still want to stop it, but the obsessing about it needs to stop first. I'm just making it worse by talking about it all the time.

Instead, I'll let you all know how it's going each week, if I've figured anything out. I'll share any tricks or tips on how to stop it, that is if I actually ever figure out how to stop it.

My food
Why does every social get together have to revolve around food? Last night it was sushi when I met up with two girlfriends to celebrate our August birthdays. We had a great time, but I ate about 15 pieces of sushi (too much). Then I came home and was starving so I ate a bunch of other crap. None of which were filling foods. Sushi is definitely not a filling food for me.

This afternoon I left work early for an early dinner and a movie with another girlfriend. It was some Mama something place for dinner, Italian. Yes, a dieter's worse nightmare. I ordered an Italian Chop Chop salad without the salami. It was lettuce, tomatoes, smoked Gouda, smoked turkey and a couple slices of avocado, with a balsamic vinaigrette. It was delicious but very little Gouda or turkey and also the smallest salad I've ever seen. Which led to SweetTarts and a few handfuls of movie popcorn.

The movie
The Time Traveler's Wife. I read the book a couple years ago and cried. Today I cried while watching the movie. A total and complete chick flick. Something my husband, who will usually go to chick flicks with me, actually said no way he was going to see this movie. Probably because when I was reading the book I kept telling him the story. He said it was the stupidest premise for a book that he'd ever heard. I loved the book and loved the movie.

The gym
Dear God, please make him go away! What is the deal with the 38-ear old guy that keeps hanging around me and insists on telling me his life story and all his girl problems. Today it was how his 53-year old girlfriend had broken up with him the day before. He was asking me all kinds of questions as to why I thought she broke up with him. Maybe you talk too much!

He's making me crazy. When I see him I try to sneak and go to one of the other workout rooms. It's kind of ruining my mornings. I've tried the headphones, the "I really need to workout and can't talk", the "I'm really in a rush this morning and have to keep moving". None of it's working. He hangs around me like a lost puppy dog. I know he wants me to be his friend, but news flash, I don't want to be his freaking friend!

I'm at my wits end on this one.

Pamela
If you're fan of Pamela (and who isn't?), her blog is back up. She had a little technical difficulty and disappeared on us for a while. Stop by and say hi to her and welcome her back to blogland. I, for one, sure did miss her.

8 comments:

Lia said...

Food is to be loved since it is such a cultural and celebratory thing. It is a pleasurable experience, except when food becomes an emotional and mental enemy. I had that problem for a while, and am now coming to the point, finally, where I really love food and can enjoy it without the little voice saying "food is bad 'cause it makes you fat. Food has caused me so much pain and emotional turmoil." I think loving food again comes with time, when the relationship has sorted itself out (in whatever way that ends up being). SO, what am I saying, I started rambling. Right, going out can be a pain when things are still tough in relation to food, but inevitable. I guess it is one of those things that even if you want to avoid, the reality is that you cannot, so in a way it kinda pushes you to be out of your comfort zone and you have to learn how to deal with the temptations.

Anywhoooo, the gym guy situation makes me laugh, sorry. Thinking of him as a lost puppy hehehe. I donno how direct you were. Sometimes I get dehydrated and then I'm brutally honest hahaha, "Look, you're a nice guy, but you distract me from my workouts and this is ME time." He'll get over it. Life has some awkward situations hahaha.

Roxie said...

I find if I focus on the food, the scale, the exercise then I get obsessive about it and it all goes to hell in a handbasket. It's sort of a fine line, a balancing act to keep it together. And perhaps a day ISN'T the best measurement of time. Perhaps we should concentrate on a week as a time frame. A month. I'm still trying to find the answer myself, but I believe I'm getting closer.

I agree with the other poster. Just tell him, as nicely as possible, this is your only time that you have to yourself. Pleasant but firm.

Anonymous said...

Love your posts Diana - i am a new fan - thank you - you make me laugh and cry - you are so open with your thoughts and feelings. I will continue to read your post daily and miss you when you're not here. you are beautiful!! xo Patty

Graciela said...

You may need to just be upfront and tell him you aren't interested in chatting with him, it is interfering with your workout. He seems to be pretty dense, and sometimes the only way to deal with some people is to be very blunt. Don't let him ruin your workouts!

As for the food thing...I'm clueless too. I go along great and I think I've got it whipped, and then I'm off on a tangent for days. My latest thing has been red licorice. I can't stop buying it, I'll often eat a whole bag (a 6 serving bag, 150 cal per serving) in the car on my way home.

So if you do come up with any insights, I'd love to know them! :)

Anyway, don't beat yourself up, the fact that you still workout and at least try to watch what you eat is a big plus.

antgirl said...

I know that hormones always win. So, yes, I think some 'out of the norm' snacking is normal, especially for us gals. Sometimes maybe you just need it to keep your sanity. Let it be for awhile, maybe it will work itself out.

Did Graciela just say licorice? Damn. Hope i don't run into any at the store later.

Awwww, you have a groupie. Maybe he's lonely. I agree with saying this is your alone time. You have an ipod? Use it. :) You could lie and say its for work or something. Or be honest, you need your fix before a hard day.

Ida said...

I think you are wise to stop talking about the binges. Obsessing doesn't ever help. I have often wondered why every get together or celebration involves food, and usually unhealthy food, but it sure seems to. I am trying to just enjoy the people and not make it a feeding frenzie when I am with friends and family. Not always successful, but am trying.
AS far as the guy goes, you may have to be brutal with him. (and maybe you have been) Some guys just don't get the message unless you spell it out. (as in "I don't like you, go away.") Hard to do, though, at least it would be for me.

big_mummy said...

i so wanna see that movie!!! book or movie first?? thoughts??

re: everything else: you know what needs doing so lets get this shit on the road xx

Pamela said...

Diana, you are just too good to me! Thank you for pulling me back into it all!

I really want to see that movie. I've had the book for a long time, but haven't read it yet, so I have the same question as big_mummy. Read the book or watch the movie first?

I'm sorry to hear that you're still having trouble with binges! You know I understand what that's like! I'm also sorry to hear about gym guy. I have to admit that I giggled until I read further and saw how much he's bugging you! Hope you're able to get rid of him soon!