Sunday, December 6, 2009

Day 2: It's not easy to start over

This is my second day back on track. I forgot how hard it is to go from eating junk to eating a healthy, low-calorie, low-fat diet. And the exercise. Oh my gosh! I've heard of muscle memory but I think mine forgot everything they ever knew.

After 40 minutes of cardio and 40 minutes of upper body weights yesterday I could barely lift my arms last night. I looked in my exercise journal and my last serious weight lifting workout was Nov. 18. No wonder I'm in pain! I've had a few treadmill or elliptical workouts, but no strength training in almost three weeks. I felt weak as I lifted 20-pound dumbells. I hate that feeling. Plus it hurt like hell.

My food choices the last few months have been horrible and got worse as time went on. Last week was my absolute worst week. I was eating cookies and candy like an addict. Oakland airport had See's candy booths everywhere (San Francisco is the See's candy headquarters).

Unfortunately the Oakland airport was a smorgasbord of unhealthy options. Sure, they had healthy things too, but those weren't what I chose. My attitude was bad and my food choices were just as bad.

After just one day of clean eating and exercise I feel like my mind is clearing. It's like I've been in a fog and now it's finally lifting. I think fat and sugar have a very negative effect on my thinking and my happiness. I've been terribly depressed and didn't even realize what was wrong with me. I know the lack of exercise probably played a big part in the depression. Add in the terrible food choices and it's a miracle I made it through these past months.

I'm drinking a lot of water, something that's barely passed my lips these last few months. I was living on Starbucks as my beverage of choice. Normally I rarely drink Starbucks since to me it's just wasted calories. Even the "light" or "skinny" options are ridiculously high in calories.

Yet I just didn't care and was ordering at least one grande or even venti "light" pumpkin spice Frappuccino every day (sometimes two!). Having one of these beverages first thing in the morning would set my mood for the entire day. Since I'd already "blown" it, it didn't matter what I ate for the rest of the day. And if I eat bad, I don't exercise.

Today it's black coffee with a dash of 1% milk, and my normal food which is amazingly delicious. Yet a part of me is thinking about the snickerdoodles and the brownies and the See's candy. I'm like an addict craving my drug.

I'm sure I can do this, stay on the straight and narrow. It's not the easiest thing in the world but I know it's possible. After all, it's not the first time I've been down this road.

Interesting tidbit in Prevention magazine Jan. 2010 (a really good reason to get to a healthy weight!):

What Your Scale Says About Your Brain

If it registers a healthy weight, your mind is likely youthful too. In a recent UCLA study, overweight people had 4% less brain tissue than normal-weight adults--the equivalent of their minds aging 8 years. One possible cause: a high-calories or high-fat diet, which clogs arteries in the brain, restricts blood flow, and causes cells to shrink. --Lauren Geiman


100togo said...

wow! I can really relate to this! I have been so off for the last two months and am now trying to get back on track. I have to start tomorrow. All the best to you. Thanks for being such an inspiration!

Ella Enchanted said...

What a great post, Diana. I really appreciate your honesty, and I am glad to see you staying focused & back on track. I can really relate to you also.