Monday, April 12, 2010

The 'do' and the Ambien experience

The 'do'
I promise I'll post a picture of the new hair later. Although I'm not sure I like it. I have --- layers! I wondered what took her so long to cut it. Apparently she added layers under the pretense of "cleaning" up the ends.

I thought it looked good when she styled it yesterday. This morning I was very frustrated trying to flat iron many different lengths of hair. My normal five minute process took about twenty minutes.

It's funny, when I was fat if I got a haircut I didn't like, even a half inch shorter than I expected, I would cry. Seriously, I'd actually shed tears over my hair. It was like it was the only part of me that I had any control over. If I hated my hair, I felt 100% ugly because I already hated my body.

Even though I'm not loving this haircut right now, it doesn't bother me. I feel like, oh well, it'll grow back. No big deal. Anyone that knew me before would be completely shocked over this attitude about my hair. Perhaps it's because I don't totally hate my body these days. Even though it's not perfect, I'm loving it a lot more than I did at 240 pounds. :)

The Ambien experience

I've stopped taking Ambien, the prescription sleeping aid. It's dangerous! This morning I woke up and had red stuff all over my hands. It looked liked I'd murdered someone in my sleep.

My fingers were literally "beet red". OMG! I ate the roasted beet dip! I headed into the kitchen and found the container in the refrigerator, with only a couple tablespoons of dip remaining. There was about 3/4 cup in the container when I went to bed. This meant I'd eaten almost the entire 3/4 cup of dip. Considering three tablespoons was 4.5 Points, this isn't a good thing.

The even weirder thing, I didn't see any evidence of bread or crackers eaten with the dip. Plus, my fingers were a brillant red. Did I eat it with my fingers?!

I honestly have no memory of eating anything at all last night and have no idea what else I may have eaten. This is scary stuff. If I could do this, could I get in my car and drive somewhere? Or what if I go to bed mad at my husband? What if that had been blood? Kind of scared the hell out of me.

Since this is the second incident in a week where I have no memory, I've flushed the remaining five Ambien pills down the drain. It's too scary of what I'm capable of doing while under the influence. Eating food that I don't even remember enjoying is one thing, but what else am I capable of doing?

I'll have to learn how to sleep on my own. I actually fell asleep a couple times last week without it so I think I'll be okay. Speaking of sleep...that's where I'm going now.

Happy Tuesday!


Shrinkabootie said...

That's creepy!

I get the hair thing. When I was talked into bangs a few months ago I hated them, still do. I pin them back pretty much every day and pray they'll grow out quickly. I want my sassy little bob back. I felt more confident with that hair than I do with this hair. I feel like I look like a 12 year old girl with these bangs. Girls take their hair seriously!

Roxie said...

I get the Ambien thing. I made an "Ambien" post on FB the other day. Jeez. So, like you, I'm forgoing the Ambien. And that's why you have me posting at 3AM.

Deniz said...

I always feel a little apprehensive about things to help with sleep, but maybe that's just me and my paranoia.

Tried chamomile tea before bed? Or listening to some soothing and quiet music just as you settle into bed? Or even a form of meditation or the dreaded 'stretch each muscle then relax' yoga warm down stuff? Might help.

BTW, meant to say the other day - good going on the sugar-free front. Hope it'll keep you as strong and focused as you are right now. Actually, avoiding the stuff may help with letting you sleep better too.

Miz said...

can not wait to see the new hair. Im in sore need of a headmakeover :)

and the sleep thing? lordy dont get me started. Im like a shift worker these days :) ---by accident and because of my child.
zonked by 9 and up at 4.

Danielle said...

Make sure to tell your doctor about your reaction(s) to the Ambien. Because some side effects of medications are rare, doctors may not get to them in the list of possible side effects that they tell their patients about, so knowing of a specific case can help them help warn other people. (My friend had a bad reaction to the Hepatitis vaccine, that they actually ended up reporting to the manufacturer of the vaccine and it had to be added to the possible side effects list because it wasn't on there before)

Ambien is usually the first sleep aid doctors prescribe because it does work for the majority of people without any major problems. There might be something else you can take, or a lower dose, if you feel you need it.

Helen said...

Phantom Ambien eating = not good! However, lack of sleep is not good either. I hope you can find a solution soon. I actually only take Ambien if I've had several sleepless days in a row. Usually 1 pill/1 night and I'm good. Looking forward to seeing the hair!

Kyle Gershman said...

Congrats on dumping the Ambien...medication is bad ummkay. I know little to nothing about sleep disorders so I'll just keep my fingers crossed that you'll conquer this and soon!

spunkysuzi said...

I have to admit i have to take something for my sleep but i've never done anything like that. There are other things besides Ambien. Actually my Dr. has never recommended that one!

Carrieheff said...

Wow, that is very scary! I'm glad you are able to stop taking it. Have you been on it since you've committed to 8 hours of sleep a night? Maybe now that you are sleeping more you might be able to fall asleep on your own. Good luck!

Seth said...

weird. Not sure what to think about Ambien. I don't like meds anyway so it'd be really hard to get me to take some (unless it saves my life of course). I hope you get quality sleep soon!

Anonymous said...

O my goodness how scary. Blood red hands...that would chill anyone to the bone. Good luck sleeping. After experimenting with a bunch of meds, my doc has me take Ativan, no side effects and wake refreshed. Good luck!

lindalou said...

If you did kill your husband, you could still get your workouts done in prison....the prisoner are BUFF. One good thing.

just kiddin...glad you flushed the pills. I take Advil but no sleepwalking and eating happening.

Graciela said...

I found the Ambien story funny, a bit scary, and a bit ironic... considering "our" recently convicted murderer claimed to have no memory of killing 4 people while in an alcoholic black out. :-) So that's kind of on my mind right now.

Instead of Ambien, have you ever tried Tylenol PM? Sometimes when I can't sleep (which is not often), I take just one and it works like a charm. And no side effects...that I know of!

Good attitude about the haircut...yup, it's just hair it will grow back.

Forgettable said...

My husband had the same experience with Ambien--he would eat in his sleep quite often. There were even times that he would go to bed before me and then come back out to the living room and hold an entire conversation with me before I would realize he was sleeping and talking! It was crazy. I think you did the right thing by getting rid of the pills.

Debbie said...

I have never taken Ambien, but I have tried other things. I think you did the right thing because they can be hard to get off of.

I also cut my hair off last week and I am upset with the cut, but it will grow back.

Ida said...

I've heard about this sort of thing happening with Ambien. That is why my dr. prescribed Roseram, it doesn't have those side effects.

Pamela said...

Oh my god, Diana! That's terrifying! I'm glad that you're dumping the Ambien!

zolpidem said...

It is fantastic that it wears off so quickly - no residual tiredness in the morning like other sleep-aids. I do wish it lasted longer. It really only keeps you asleep for ~4 hours. I guess that's what Ambien CR is for.