Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Into every life a little rain must fall

The Rainy Day

Written at the old home in Portland, Maine by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

The day is cold, and dark, and dreary;
It rains,and the wind is never weary;
The vine still clings to the mouldering wall,
But at every gust the dead leaves fall,
And the day is dark and dreary.
My life is cold, and dark, and dreary;
It rains,and the wind is never weary;
My thoughts still cling to the mouldering past,
But the hopes of youth fall thick in the blast,
And the days are dark and dreary.
Be still, sad heart, and cease repining;
Behind the clouds is the sun still shining;
Thy fate is the common fate of all,
Into each life some rain must fall,
Some days must be dark and dreary.

I've written several posts this past week, each one sadder and more depressing than the previous one. I didn't publish any of them. I couldn't bring myself to share my sadness with the world.

This morning I had written an entire post about the misery of my life. I had started it with the poem above. My work, marriage, dieting...everything seem broken beyond repair.

Then the strangest thing happened. After working from home during the morning, on a project that I've been struggling with for the last week, I decided to drive into the office. Someone that I use to work with that's on another team emailed me, asking if I was still having a problem on my project. I told him yes, I was struggling. He said he'd be in the office today and if I wanted, he'd come by my desk and seek if he could help. I quickly showered, dressed, and headed off to the office.

When I left my house at noon, the sky was dark and dreary, it was raining and the wind was blowing. I felt like the weather perfectly matched my mood.

As I drove the twelve miles to my office, the skies opened open, and there, in all it's glory was the sun. I hadn't seen the sun for at least a week, maybe longer. I really can't remember the last time it wasn't raining. For the last ten minutes of my commute, the sun was shining, I felt my mood lift. Suddenly things didn't seem so hopeless and impossible.

I'd actually made a lot of headway on my project this morning, before I received the email from my friend. I still had a few things I was still having trouble figuring out, and I knew he'd know the answers, and fortunately for me, he did.

The thing I'm working on wasn't really my project until last Wednesday. Someone else was working on it for the last several months. Without going into much detail, I was asked to take it over and get it finished quickly. One of my coworkers often teases me that when I get in a situation like this one,  I always pull a rabbit out of my hat and get the job done. This time I was really feeling like I couldn't pull it off. I've always thought that one day there was going to be something I couldn't figure out. I'm happy to say this wasn't it. I'll be finished in a couple days.

As quickly as my work situation improved, everything else seemed to fall into place. My husband is being super sweet, feeling bad for me because I'd worked last weekend, and several evenings the past week.

Today, for the first time in several days I ate perfectly on plan. I haven't been eating terrible, no Easter candy, no Cadbury eggs, but as usual, my portions are too large, and I was eating to much fruit (can we say bananas). It all adds up, a calorie is a calorie, and I know I can't eat unlimited amounts of fruit.

It's funny how everything that seemed so bad now suddenly seems good. In every life a little rain must fall, but like Longfellow said, the sun is still there behind the clouds. And into ever life a little sun must shine.


Roxie said...

What's the old saying? "This too shall pass." It's so hard to remember that when we are dancing near the abyss. I'm so glad that things righted themselves for you. Sunshine, indeed.

Helen said...

Hey! I'm related to Henry Wadsworth Longfellow and I've been to the place where he did most of his writing. If you ever get to Maine, go to the Portland Light. There is a great monument there celebrating Henry's life.

We're having our first sunny day in 4 today. The greyness and dreariness definitely can make everything about your life feel heavy. Glad that things are looking better for you. At least for today. And that's all you have to think about. Just today.

Lyn said...

I'm glad you're feeling better! The PNW gloom gets to me, too.

bbubblyb said...

Glad to hear you are feeling better Diana, big hug to you.

Dawn said...

Lovely to have people around you who care enough to see if you need a little help. No wonder such a kind thought led to the cheering up of your day...you are lucky indeed

~ Lyndsay The Kitchen Witch said...

This was beautiful. I'm so glad the sun has begun to peek through :-)

Carrieheff said...

I had a moment like that a few days go as well. We haven't been getting much sun in Michigan and it gets depressing. I was driving and the sun peaked out for about 5 mins. It was so nice to just see it and feel the warmth. Just think, soon Summer will be here and the sun will be out everyday!! Hang in there!