Sunday, July 22, 2012

Hanging in there with life...and death

I had a great, happy, upbeat and cheerful post all ready to post on Friday, but I wanted to proof-read it before posting it and as a result, I never posted it. Then things happened and it seemed unimportant..

I'd had a good night food-wise on Thursday, went to the gym Friday morning and worked out like a maniac. The first 15 minutes were pure hell. I won't lie. I HATED every sweating, hurt pumping, painful second. I wanted to leave, not walk, but run out the front door. I stayed for an hour and a half. It changed my entire attitude for the rest of the day and even for the next day. Now I remember why exercised is an essential part of the weight loss plan. Losing weight is really about what's going on in my head.

Yesterday morning I took my sister to see a movie, The Dark Knight Rises. No reviews on that movie. You'll have to make your own mind up on that one. After I dropped off my sister at her home I drove to the airport to catch the 5:40pm flight to Denver, with my husband. It's now Sunday morning, 6:30am. I'm in a hotel in Aurora, Colorado.

We're here to say our final final goodbyes to my father-in-law. He's in the final stages of emphysema (from smoking) and is going to be moved into hospice care this afternoon. He requested that everyone come see him now since he probably only has a week or two left. He has a multitude of health issues, one of which is receiving blood transfusions every other day massive bleeding ulcers.  He's down to 98 pounds.

Although I'm not close to my father-in-law (we've never lived in the same state), my heart weeps for my husband. He's never lost anyone in his life, other than his grandmother. I lost parents many years ago. I know it hurts like hell to lose someone you love so much.

The hospital my father-in-law is in is about two blocks from the theater where the shootings took place a few days ago at the premiere of The Dark Knight Rises in Aurora. The hotel, also about a block from the hospital, is packed with reporters. I'm not looking forward to this day but I just have to get through it. Of course the hospital has several of the victims there too. Really dreading this day.

We plan on leaving back to Seattle tonight. I just want this day to be over. I'm sure we'll be back here within a couple weeks for the funeral.

Diet nd exercise aren't on the top of my list right now, but I'll do my best to eat right while I'm here. It's going to be 98 degrees today so walking outside isn't really an option. There's a guest fitness room, but since the hotel is packed, I'm sure it will be too. Plus I didn't bring any workout clothes. More important, I really don't care about that right now. I really wish I was home right now.


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