Saturday, January 17, 2015

Off to a turtle pace start for 2015

It's been three weeks since I posted anything. Three weeks of constantly thinking I really need to do something about my weight, but not putting much effort into it. I sort of tried, but not really. I didn't eat a few boxes of cookies or bags of candy that I would have normally eaten. I only ate fast food once. I walked during lunch a few times and hit the gym once or twice a week. Isn't it strange how we make our new normal? Mine had become no exercise and eating every piece of junk I wanted.

This morning I logged into Weight Watchers. I signed up for online three weeks ago and logged my food twice during that time. Today I told myself is the day that I get serious about losing weight. Of course that voice in my head said "ha, I've heard that before!". Shut up head if you can't stay positive.

I entered my food in the tracker for today and looked at the weight tracker. I had added my weight on December 28 but hadn't touched it since then. I weighed this morning, and I really wasn't sure what my weight was before I started my half-assed attempt at losing weight. I was very surprised to see I'd lost 7.2 pounds in three weeks. Although I'm a little happy about it, part of me can't help but think if I had really made an effort, I could have lost a lot more. I know from my past efforts that when I start out at a high weight, 236 pounds this time, the weight comes off pretty easy to the beginning. At least I didn't gain 7.2 pounds. Yes, that's the bad voice in my head that wants to make me fail at this, now allowing me to be happy about what it considers a mediocre weight loss. I'm working on shutting down that voice, but a lifetime of listening to it make it hard.

I got a Fitbit Flex as a gift from where I work (we could choose anything from our company store for $100 - I chose the Fitbit). I love this thing. The few times I've actually used it, it really motivated me. Well, at least for a few days. When I didn't make an effort to exercise it was depressing to look at it. I walked yesterday at lunch and was delighted to see the walk was three miles. I had measured it on a few years ago, and I was happy to see the fitbit came up with the same distance. Fitbit results from yesterday (fitbit emailed me that I was an over achiever. Hahaha!):

I don't have an exciting scheduled today. I had a healthy, late breakfast, now some house cleaning (I love a clean house but hate to clean), a gym visit and maybe a walk with my boyfriend (he joined my gym and loves going to the gym...nice, but sometimes annoying too). Then something light and healthy for dinner. 

One day at a time is all I can do. It would be great if I could keep up a two pound a week weight loss, but I know that's not realistic. As long as I give this at least some effort, I'll be happy. I doubt I'll become a crazed maniac going to the gym five or six days a week and tracking every single bite I eat - at least not every day. That's just not me anymore. I'm pretty sure that "do or die" attitude I had was exactly what helped lead me down the path to cancer. I'm a little more relaxed about stuff these days. It's the key to a happy life. 


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