Thursday, June 9, 2016

Rewiring my brain

This is a real switcheroo in my behavior. I went to Weight Watchers on Monday night, and I have tracked every bite of food for three full days, stayed within my Point allotment and actually walked two of the three days.

Today I even went for a 3-mile hike through the woods during my lunch hour (with a girlfriend from work). I'm working up to getting back to the gym, but at the moment the extra walking is all I can do. I'm easing myself back into more activity. Tonight my knees, hips, and legs ache. Getting back into shape is more painful than I remember. Perhaps being almost 61 years old has something to do with it.

I've been thinking of something a friend of mine that's a Chemical Dependency Counselor told me about people that are alcoholics or drug addicts. Many overweight people I know say they're addicted to food. I hear it all the time in Weight Watcher meetings, and I've said the same thing about myself many times. That food is my drug of choice.

I asked my friend what is the trick to getting off of drugs or alcohol. How does someone addicted let go of that thing they love so much that's destroying their life? He said it's a matter of rewiring their brain. The brain is very powerful and when it gets something that makes it feel good, it wants more of it. It will continually nag at you and do anything it can to make you get that thing that makes it feel good. Even though it knows it's not good for you, it still wants it. You have to stop that type of thinking and take control of the brain.

I realize this sounds like we have two brains in our head, but in a really weird way, I get what he's saying. My brain is an addict to sugar. It always wants sugar, telling me how good it'll make me feel. Even though I know it's not good for me, I hear the voices in my head tell me it's okay, you can quit tomorrow. A bag of cookies today, then we'll call it quits. Ha! I know that doesn't work.

Right now, I'm trying to rewire my brain. It is not easy.

Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Here I go again

I've had so many false attempts at losing weight, that I was just about ready to give up. Forget about the whole thing, the "thing" being losing weight. Seriously, I'm just tired of trying and failing.

Then a couple things happened. A dear friend that had the sleeve weight loss surgery has lost 150 pounds and is still losing. I had a twinge of jealousy when I saw her recently. She's one-year post op and almost at her goal weight. I don't envy her not being able to eat more than a bite of food at a time or the loose skin or sadly the wrinkles in her face that I'd never noticed before. I do, however, envy her skinny thighs. I envy how she doesn't even think of food and forgets to eat.

Another friend, that I went to New York with about two weeks ago (part work, part fun), is doing the Kettibility program (only in Seattle). A mix of an intense boot camp kettle ball workout with "Russian" kettle balls, the Whole 30 eating plan, submitting daily food journals (via Facebook) and weekly weigh-ins. I've never seen this friend so excited about weight loss. And yes, she's doing amazing.

So what about me? I went back to Weight Watchers tonight. It's been a while, probably a couple months, since I even attempted to watch what I was eating. I was surprised I'd actually gone down a few pounds since my last weight. I think I was 224 last time I weighed in, and today, at my 6:30pm weigh-in, I was 219. I told the Weight Watcher gal to wipe out my account, and I was started new today.

So yes, here I go again. Another attempt at losing weigh. No grand plans here or ideas on how I'll really make it happen this time. Just a short note that I'm still here, and I haven't given up.