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| Denali - the great one (aka Mt. McKinley) |
I grew up in Alaska, and have seen this beautiful mountain many times. It's one of the ultimate challenges for mountain climbers, and many have lost their life in their attempt to conquer this magnificent mountain.
What does this have to do with weight loss? Sometimes my struggle feels like an uphill battle, on the steepest slope I can imagine. It feels like the hardest thing I've ever done or ever will do. I know intellectually that's a false statement, but in my heart, I believe it's true. This fight to lose weight, or at least maintain my current weight, is difficult. The constant battle to maintain some semblance of control over what I eat continues to be a battle.
I skipped my Weight Watchers' meetings for four weeks. I found an excuse every Sunday morning to stay home. I was tired, I felt bloated or my best friend wasn't going (she hasn't gone for four months so that was a really lame excuse). The real reason of course was that I'd gained weight. Eight pounds to be exact. I got my 50-pound lost charm and then immediately went into an eating frenzy, because frankly my dear, I didn't give a damn! I was hungry!
My weight is a constant battle. I really wish I had the answers on how to make this work. Everything I read about people that have lost weight is that they will have to fight this battle forever. Something about our bodies fight us tooth and nail to get back to our high weight. I'm in that battle right now. It's hard.
That's about all I can say. I wish this was a rainbow and kittens post, and everything nice. It's not. It's a "life is hard" post. But as so many of us that struggle with our weight have heard before, we pick our hard. Being morbidly obese is hard. I know, because I was 240 pounds. I know that was actually much harder than being 167 pounds and fighting to at least stay that weight. I guess I'll just continue the good fight. What other choice do I have?
6 comments:
But you haven't given up. That's what counts.
Every time I hit a milestone, I stay there for weeks and/or months, and every time I tiptoe below, I find myself eating everything in sight for a day or two. Maybe it was the same with your 50-pounds charm? (At one point I stopped weighing myself when I got close to a milestone, for a full month, and that milestone just swooshed past. Maybe I should do that right now, stuck on 70 kg for two months now - with only 5-8 kg to go! :-/ )
Anyway, good luck, and I believe you can do it!
Hello Diana
Thank you for commenting on my post! So glad you are still blogging and that you are close to your weight goals. I’m so happy that you have beat cancer, that’s wonderful and amazing.
That darn scale. I hate it. It’s such a struggle whether it is in your body or your mind. I wonder if I will ever be over it. Although years of therapy have helped me, I’m definitely not cured of my issues.
Anyway, the lady we had lunch with in Seattle…her blogging name was Roxie but her real name was Vanessa. Not sure why she stopped blogging, but I hope she is okay.
Would love to keep in touch and maybe even get together for lunch or a drink. Take care and thank you for still reading! :-)
You have lots of choices....you can chose to give up totally and watch yourself gain weight at a rapid pace. You can give up any attempts to exercise and be healthy and watch you fitness levels fall away to nothing and thus possibly end up in a notarized wheel chair down the line! You can sit on the fence and be half hearted about losing/maintaining and watch the weight creep on slowly.....igniting a maelstrom of self hatred! Or you can knuckle down and step up to the plate and put your physical well being first and eat right and move more! See lots of choices!!!! (And just in case you wanted to know....this response to you was kinda aimed at myself!!!!)
I wonder if it's easier for people who have had weight loss surgery? I feel exactly the same way. Some days I just feel so tired of the battle. Seeing my hubby who can eat anything and not gain an ounce is infuriating. But, somehow. we keep fighting it don't we? Because we know deep down it's worth it. It's worth all the struggles and bad days. I hope we both get there someday so we are happy with how our bodies look and feel!
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